The days are long and full as I push forward to make a very exciting thing happen. In just three weeks, I am putting on a presentation for all the people in the "birth world" here in Western MA (I say this as IF they are all going to come). Little old I, with the assistance of this amazing fund that has accrued through the generosity of many local families, am flying out this wonderful, thoughtful, compassionate and most of all knowledgable speaker to present a seminar called, "Compassionate Caregiving when a Baby Dies." Cathi Lammert is the executive director of Share, which is one of the biggest national infant/pregnancy loss support groups. She has been in this "business" for over twenty five years, since her son Christopher died. She is also a nurse and has walked this road with so many hundreds of families she is just an amazing wealth of information, thoughts, and experiences.
I have put so much thought into planning this seminar so that people will actually come to it. We are doing it at two different times, on two different days, to make it more available to nurses who work different shifts. I have tried to send our publicity everywhere I can. I wavered between making it free, which I could afford to do, but was advised that people are more likely to skip out on the day of for something they haven't paid for. So I made it cheap, and as it will provide nurses particularly with professional development points, hopefully that will be a lure. In addition I am offering three "scholarship" spots for every OB or midwifery practice in the area. But I am so afraid nobody will come. Here I am, flying this woman from St Louis, and she has SO MANY amazing, important ideas for these people, and maybe they will just recycle the flyer.
I spoke of this fear to Cathi, who said, If one person comes it will be worth it, because one person will help their next loss patient more compassionately. And I know that she is right. But I want a lot of people to come. I want them to come so that others will get better care, but truly I desperately want them to come because I want to see that SOMEBODY cares about perinatal loss. I want to see that somebody is actually trying to become more educated on the subject, and that they feel it is a worthy expense of their time.
Nursing schools as well as medical schools literally barely touch on this subject. To me, this is appalling. The families who bring babies home will barely remember their nurses. The families whose babies die will see their nurse's face for the rest of their life. They will hang on every word, verbatim. Their care will significantly impact their entire grief experience and, therefore, the rest of their LIFE. And this is unimportant?
I am just really hoping that people come. If you are in the Western MA vicinity and know anyone in the birth world (midwives, doulas, OBs, nurses, etc) please consider sending them my way this November. I am truly hoping for a success.