The Calm within the storm

Thank you for your comments, and I will pass them on... Baby Andrew is still fighting and although at his tender age doctors are not optimistic, each day he pulls through is considered progress. I keep remembering this saying, which helped me through many a dark day myself, I don't know where it is from:


Faith is the bird that sees the light when the dawn is still dark



This sudden change, this visible newness in my cousin's life, and for all their family, is reminding me once again to be grateful, and faithful to what I believe in: in tenderness, caring, gratitude, and true love. I am seeing my children all over again, and giving to them in a conscientious way, having been reminded of the frailty of it all.

Although Andrew's illness devastates me, I am not terrified by it in the way that I might be. I learned my lesson five years ago. I know how quickly things can change, how unstable even the most secure things can become. I know that his being ill does not make my family any more vulnerable.

Andrew does, however, remind me of this: that I must be true to what I believe, that I must give to my children in the ways that feel most genuine to me, that I must show my love to others liberally and generously. We do not know for sure what tomorrow may bring.

Meanwhile, as they wage this war downtown in the depths of Sick Kids, the sun shines here. I am everly aware of how tidy it is for me to avoid this crisis, here on the beach, my hair blowing in the stiff wind as August begins to draw to a close. My children are blissfully ignorant of their cousin's illness, knowing only that "he is sick". Birds carry on, chirping merrily, there is joy everywhere around me in other ways. This really is just life. And for some people, it is really difficult right now.