Setting things straight

We know all too well that life is unpredictable and you never know what's coming next. So I like to keep my conscience clean. I just did something to clean out a little corner of my heart, and it feels good so far.
I have a dear cousin, born only 10 weeks before me, and we have been close since birth. She never had any sisters and she has always been very special to me. Her first baby was born on September 24th of this year, and of course we all know mine was Charlotte born 4 years and 6 months and 26 days ago. Not that I'm counting.
When Charlotte died, we kept with our original plan of going up to our summer cottage when she would have been 3 months old. We go for four or five weeks each summer and it is really our soul space there. The lake is peaceful and the old cottage echoes with the shadows of five generations of my family. We couldn't not go. But it was a challenge, and while we did some deep healing there, my extended family was not as outwardly supportive as our friends at home had been. This was challenging, and so we kept to ourselves most of the time.
Upon returning home I expressed some of this disappointment over e-mail to my special cousin. She herself had been very supportive of me, but hadn't been there that often. She began to write back with her take on the situation. Except that she hadn't ever had a baby, and in trying to defend and explain the behavior of some of our relatives, she ended up hurting my feelings. I ended the e-mail correspondence abrubtly, realizing too late that some things shouldn't ever be talked about on a computer screen. It's all too fast, too anonymous, and too easy to press send.
Julie and I never really talked about it again, except that there has been a little rift there ever since. I always felt I couldn't bring it up until she had a new perspective. I am hoping with the birth of her daughter, perhaps she can now see that I was in a pretty deranged spot and certainly I have the perspective at this point to forgive her for anything she said. I know her intentions were always for the best.
So today I sent her a letter to tell her that I loved her dearly and wanted that rift to go away, if she still felt it (which I suspect she does). It makes me glad to clear a little space in my heart because having aired those feelings I don't have to worry about them anymore. There are many things in my life that I think and worry about and I wish I could drag up the courage to think about more of them and act upon them.
I realize that I have some pretty big-ticket items in my emotional bank and it's important for me to do housecleaning when I can. Also I love the thought that something that's bringing me worries that doesn't have to can be erased from the list.
So that's one off my list. Now what shall be next...